Understanding

Today I finally made peace with my ex-boyfriend.
He returned my calls and we spoke. Openly and honestly.

It was more confirmation of what I had expected but he did throw me a few surprises.

I had written him numerous letters but he hadn't read any of them.
I had written him again only last night.

I asked him if it was my last letter that made him respond and he told me "No" it was a friend of his that had finally conviced him to read them and to face me.
Although greatful to his friend I felt somewhat shafted that it wasn't our connection that had led him here.
To which he replied

"It's not always about you"

He has a way of telling me exactly what I need to hear even if I don't wanna hear it.

I asked him if he'd have been so brave had we not been separated by an ocean.

He just laughed and told me I already knew the answer to that.

I'll admit I was emotionally wrecked afterwards but it was the ending, the resolution we both needed.

Basically he set me free. He set me free for me.

I will always love him and he will always love me.

I had really hurt him and he was avoiding me and I get that, but he was man enough to face me and be honest.

It was the understanding we both needed to move on.
I admire him so much.

I haven't felt this strong in a long time.
Finally it feels like I'm making progress.

I'm dealing with my issues rather than running away from them or clouding myself with distractions.

For the first time I have faith in myself.
I believe I can do this.

I will do this.
I am doing this!

Today I learnt 2 very important lessons

First and foremost... LOVE is understanding.

And the second... in the words of a wise blogger I admire

"I am reason enough"

Sonny this one's for you xoxo