Reignition

I've been out of the blogging loop for a little while now.
Mostly because I've been too busy, but also because I haven't felt like writing.
Here I am again... let's see what happens.

How am I feelings these days?

I don't feel dark, or hopeless or empty.
But something is off.

Maybe I'm broken inside.

I'm out, I'm living.
I'm studying, I'm making new friends, I'm partying.
But I don't feel any of it.

It's feels more like I'm standing on the outside looking in
No depression or sadness but no happiness or joy either.

I'm getting along well with my family and friends.
Making strides to improve my health.

Actually I'm well on my way to sorting all my shit out.
I keep on moving but with out some kind of emotion it all seems... well kinda pointless.

I'm getting everything I want so shouldn't I feel something?

I tire of simply goin through the motions.
I want passion
I want to feel it burning inside me
I want that drive
I want satisfaction.

I used to have all these things.
Now it seems I am a watered down version of myself.

What good is victory if you can't enjoy it.

The spark is gone.
I gotta find a way to re-ignite the fire within.